Spurs tonight. Win? I think so. Epic win.
Come on, people, I know I can't be the only one who reads. Holidaze? May is National Get Caught Reading month? I need books to promote? Yes?!



Song promotion of the day -
Oildale by Korn
Let Me Hear You Scream by Ozzy
I Wish I Had an Angel by Nightwish


My Gal Friday…Steffi Style Song Promotion of the Day-
Baracuda by Heart
Dream On by Aerosmith
I Love Rock & Roll by Joan Jett & the Blackhearts
and your Friday bonus
Ruby Tuesday by Katey Sagal



Today in History
from www.todayinhistory.com

1888 George Eastman patents "Kodak box camera"
1914 US Congress establishes mother's day
1934 World's largest pearl (6.4 kg) found at Palawan, Philippines
1982 Oakland Raiders to move to LA
1994 Gary Hart's girlfriend Donna Rice (36) weds Jack Hughes (42)
^Now, does that make ANY kind of sense?

Quotes
from www.thinkexist.com

“The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.” ~Albert Einstein

“Compelling reason will never convince blinding emotion.” ~Richard Bach

“One sheds one's sicknesses in books--repeats and presents again one's emotions, to be master of them.” ~D H Lawrence

“Poetry is not a turning loose of emotion, but an escape from emotion; it is not the expression of personality but an escape from personality. But, of course, only those who have personality and emotion know what it means to want to escape from these” ~Emily Dickinson


Quotes
from random friends, family, etc.

"Moths now? Your on a roll tonight! Whats next? A fly teradactyl?" ~Brandon (B Money)(formerly "The Mail Guy")

"wearing my sunglasses. no. you may not have my autograph!" ~Steffi-ism


Word of the Day
from www.dictionary.com

eristic - pertaining to argument for its own sake.


Holidaze
from www.brownielocks.com

May is Get Caught Reading Month.
My picks are The Last Oracle by James Rollins and Solipsist by Henry Rollins.
***Please send me your own picks so I can include them.***

May is also Borderline Personality Disorder Month.
what is borderline personality disorder?
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a serious and often life-threatening disorder that is characterized by severe emotional pain and difficulties managing emotions. The problems associated with BPD include impulsivity (including suicidality and self-harm), severe negative emotion such as anger and/or shame, chaotic relationships, an extreme fear of abandonment, and accompanying difficulties maintaining a stable and accepting sense of self. Thus, BPD is characterized by pervasive instability of mood, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and actions, often negatively affecting loved ones, family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of self-identity.
(from http://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/)


This week is National Hug Week. Feel free to give me a hug.

Today is….No Pants Day?!?!
It is also Tuba Day & World Asthma Day.

Tomorrow! Is! No! Socks! Day!



WikiWikiWikiWiki
from www.wikipedia.org

Sometimes the word hypnagogia is used in a restricted sense to refer to the onset of sleep, and contrasted with hypnopompia, Frederic Myers's term for waking up.[3] However, hypnagogia is also regularly employed in a more general sense that covers both falling asleep and waking up, and Havelock Ellis questioned the need for separate terms.[4] Indeed, it is not always possible in practice to assign a particular episode of any given phenomenon to one or the other, given that the same kinds of experience occur in both, and that people may drift in and out of sleep. In this article hypnagogia will be used in the broader sense, unless otherwise stated or implied.

Other terms for hypnagogia, in one or both senses, that have been proposed include "presomnal" or "anthypnic sensations", "visions of half-sleep", "oneirogogic images" and "phantasmata",[5], "the borderland of sleep", "praedormitium",[6] the "borderland state", "half-dream state", "pre-dream condition",[7] "sleep onset dreams",[8] dreamlets,[9] and "wakefulness-sleep transition" state (WST).[10]


(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypnagogic_state)



My Life is Average
www.mylifeisaverage.com

Today I realized that I only have eleven green sheets of paper left until I finally get to the red pieces in my multi-coloured notebook. I am so excited! MLIA.
**Someone is OBVIOUSLY as easily amused as I am...**

Today, I used the last bit of ink from my pen that I purchased and used from start to finish without losing. It ran out while writing the word "gone". Way to go, you were a good pen. MLIA
**This is one of my goals in life. To use a whole pen. Without losing it. Without having it stolen. Yes. This person is obviously a poet.**

The other day, my english teacher handed back a homework packet. While I was flipping through the numerous pages, I saw that she had written "Cheese!" randomly on one of the pages. Mrs. Bean, I always knew you were my favorite teacher.



Customers are Fun
from www.notalwaysright.com

Yukon Not Believe This Juan
Border Checkpoint Canada

Me: “I need to see your Visa, ma’am.”
Tourist: “What for? It doesn’t cost to go to Canada, does it?”
Me: “Not your credit card ma’am, your Visa to enter the country.”
Tourist: “What do you mean?”
Me: “You need to have a Visa to leave the United States, ma’am.”
Tourist: “I’m not leaving the United States!”
Me: “Yes you are, ma’am, beyond here is Canada.”
Tourist: “Canada isn’t outside the United States!”
Me: “And what makes you think that, ma’am?”
Tourist: “Because there’s no water between the two places! Its one big hunk of land!”
Me: “Country borders do not have to be separated by water, ma’am. Both Canada and Mexico are different countries yet directly connected to the United States.”
Tourist: “Well of course Mexico is a different country, it’s separated from America by water!”
Me: “No it’s not, ma’am.”
Tourist: “Ain’t you ever heard of the Gulf of Mexico?”


Chuck Norris Factoid of the Day
from www.chucknorrisfactoids.com

"Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash. "


Funny Pics
from the www.icanhascheezburger.com collection














Personal
from the life & times of jessi bean

All I have to say is that I hate Buffalo Wild Wings (1604 & 281). They are evil, their management is lacking, and it's a dirty place. If I wanted a bug in my drink I would have asked for one. Forget that. I would have gone to Mexico and done the whole worm in tequila thing. That would have been worth it. Not that place.

Yo, that was so fly.


♥7 more days♥


People of Chase
from the life & times of … you!

Okay, so, because there was a problem with my directions last Friday, it's the IHOP coming back toward work between Bitter & Thousand Oaks. Something like that. It's there. I'm not lying. 11:15pm tonight. Yes. :) Hopefully, unlike last night, this will be an epic win, not an epic fail.

@ Mat Xavier. I know this is late. Sorry. My honey (actually) got a cell phone. It's going to snow. Here. I know. I had to break it in. :) So I was in the break room. Procrastinating with the dOrk fOrces. But hey. At least I get it out daily, ya?

Thank you, Audrey & Molly for the cake. Hahahabananahahaha



Live…From California!!
from the adventures of SPA (my nephew & his friends)

:: silence :: ?



Random Funnies
from www.ahajokes.com

Fun Things to Do in an Elevator


Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

Sell Girl Scout cookies.

On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

Shave.

Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"

Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

One word: Flatulence!

On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

Do Tai Chi exercises.

Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, motion sickness!"

Give religious tracts to each passenger.

Meow occassionally.

Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.

Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"

Leave a box between the doors.

Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

Start a sing-along.

When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"

Play the harmonica.

Shadow box.

Say "Ding!" at each floor.

Lean against the button panel.

Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

Bring a chair along.

Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"

Blow spit bubbles.

Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.

Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."

If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"


Learn from My Fail
from www.learnfrommyfail.com


While speaking to (and flirting with) your gorgeous new boss, DO NOT, under any circumstances, pull the errant hair that’s been dangling in front of his eye for 10 minutes. His "hair" might come off and you will never be able to look at him again, forcing you to seek new employment. #LFMF

On your first day working at a resturant and someone orders a 20oz steak, be careful when delivering the food not to ask, "Allright, who’s got the big meat?" #LFMF

When your brother accidentally seriously injures you in a scuffle, don’t attempt to make him faint by opening your wound to show him the bones and tendons. You may both pass out, you for loss of blood, him for being a little girl. #LFMF






Thank you, thank you. I am here for all eternity.

♥jessi