Friday, May 21, 2010

May 19, 2010

Right. More like omnomnom. Please do not feed the Jessi, aggravate the Jessi, or give the Jessi any cigarettes. You should probably steer clear of the Jessi for a few days, as Jessi is in the middle of her one-step program to quit smoking.
The one step? No smoking! I made it all the way home last night, all through the night, all through the morning, and all the way to work without smoking. I also didn't buy any, so I'm out. So. No tempting the Jessi with nicotine-y goodness. :) Mmmkay? Mmkay. Good.


May is Clean Air Month.

This week is National Bike to Work Week.

Today is National Employee Health & Fitness Day!

Today in History

1571 Miguel Lopez de Lagazpi founded Manilla in the Phillipines
1848 Mexico gives Texas to US, ending the war
1848 1st department store opens
1893 Heavy rain wash "quick clay" into a deep valley, kills 111 (Norway)
1898 Post Office authorizes use of postcards

Word of the Day

habitué - one who frequents a particular place.

from the life & times of jessi bean

Must. Have. Mints. O__o Stay away from the light…er!!!

People of Chase
from the life & times of … you!

So. What's up? Anything interesting happen????

Scary Spice's Song Promotion of the Day
(there ya go, Jan. got mahself a nicky-name. because My Gal Friday said I was scary spice for posting a pic of the scorpion that bit me up on FaceBook. or MySpace. one of them)

Lost by Gorilla Zoe
The Truth by Jason Aldean
Es Por Ti by Juanes

Tuesday Bonus
Zombie by the cranberries

My Gal Friday…Steffi Style Song Promotion of the Day

Life's Been Good by Joe Walsh
Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison
China Grove by The Doobie Brothers

Scruffles' Song Promotion of the Day

Push It by Static-X
Bled For Days by Static-X
Destroyer by Static-X

Mid-Week Bonus
The Enemy by Static-X


“I expect to pass through this world but once; any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.” ~Stephan Grellet

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~Leo F Buscaglia

from random friends, family, etc.

"I like that flavor of vitamin water."

"i hope i never end up at the Shady Springs retirement home.....i'd never last a day!!!! but then again - i have no kids to put me there!!!!"


The tree species Aesculus glabra is commonly known as Ohio buckeye, American buckeye, or fetid buckeye. It derives its unflattering common name from the disagreeable odor generated from the flowers, crushed leaves, broken twigs, or bruised bark.


My Life is Average

Last night my parents caught me watching something on my ipod after curfew, but I was let off the hook because I was watching a documentary on dinosaurs. Best excuse ever. MLIA

Today, my friend was telling me about how she saw three guys wearing the same shirt, all in one day. Surprised, I yelled, "Three guys in one night?!" A couple of people shot looks at us. I can only imagine what they were thinking. MLIA

Today, I wore my Phantom of the Opera t-shirt. When I got home, my bedroom was dark, but something was producing a light. Confused, I started looking around. When I looked in the mirror I noticed the Phantom's mask glowing. I had a minor freak out. I hadn't realized that my shirt glowed in the dark. Good job, Opera Ghost. Good job. MLIA

Today was my first day to teach kindergarten. I got hit with a hotdog.MLIA

Learn from My Fail

When you’re frantically trying to pull over because you hear a police siren, make sure the siren isn’t part of the song on the radio. #LFMF

Customers are Fun

Emergency Services Must Be Pooped
911 Tampa, FL, USA

(I get dispatched to a call: ‘1 year old male, possibly crying’. We get on scene and the mother opens the front door with a happy and healthy baby in her arms.)
Me: “Hi, ma’am. What seems to be the problem today?”
Mother: “Well, my baby just looked terrible so I freaked out and called you guys.”
Me: “It’s not a problem. Can you tell me what happened?”
Mother: “Well it was right after dinner. He looked confused, turned bright red, and started crying uncontrollably.”
Me: “And when did he stop crying?”
Mother: “He just stopped right before you guys got here. I changed his diaper, and here we are.”
Me: “Ma’am, I think I know what the problem is. Your baby was just constipated.”
(At this point, the grandmother walks in the room.)
Grandmother: “You called 911? Are you a retarded? He had to poop! I told you he wasn’t ready for solid food! I’m sorry, guys. You can go back to the people who really need your help. I got this.”

Chuck Norris Factoid of the Day

"Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. "

Funny Pics
from the collection

Random Funnies

Thank you, thank you. I am here for all eternity.