Saturday, April 24, 2010

April 23, 2010

Ewww. It is hot and humid outside. You'd think…let's see…wow. You'd think 16 years in this place would acclimate me to the weather, namely the heat and humidity, but….no.
My hair looks like little trolls are trying to sprout. Trolls. Dang. I miss those things. I want one. Gonna have to get some decorations for my…my…Steffi what did you call it? Cube farm? Something. It was awesome and I want to use it.

Song promotion of the day -
Crazy - K-Ci & JoJo
Elejigbo - Los Fernandos
Flush Away - Indo
Freedom to Feel - John Reuben

My Gal Friday…Steffi Style Song Promotion of the Day-
I Am the Highway by Audioslave
Dang, Steffi. I wish I had thought of that song. I ♥♥♥♥ that song.

Today in History

1348 - First English order of knighthood founded (Order of Garter).
1851 - Canada issues first postage stamps.
1896 - Premier of motion pictures (Koster & Bial's Music Hall, NYC).
1949 - CHINESE RED ARMY CONQUERS NANKING **if you don't know the story behind this, it is tragic, but for the most part unknown unless you like history.**
1962 - NY Mets win their 1st game ever, after going 0-9, beat Pirates 9-1.
1985 - Coca-Cola announced it is changing its secret flavor formula.
1992 - McDonald's opens its first fast-food restaurant in China.


"Censorship reflects a society's lack of confidence in itself. It is a hallmark of an authoritarian regime." ~Potter Stewart

"What garlic is to food, insanity is to art." ~Augustus Saint-Gaudens

“We can never have enough of nature. We must be refreshed by the sight of inexhaustible vigor, vast and titanic features, the sea-coast with its wrecks, the wilderness with its living and its decaying trees, the thunder-cloud, and the rain.” ~Henry David Thoreau

Word of the Day

Moil - to labor; to toil; to drudge.

Jamais vu - the feeling of unfamiliarity.
Déjà vu - the feeling of familiarity.
Presque vu - almost, but not quite, remembering something.


April is Car Care Month, Frog Month, Jazz Appreciation Month, and Straw Hat Month.

Today is Talk Like Shakespeare Day.

My Life is Average

Today, I woke up to my parents arguing. When I went upstairs, I saw my step-dad sitting at the computer with my mother standing over his shoulder. "Hurry up!! You've been on all morning! My raspberries are going to wilt!" Gee, thanks Farmville. My parents are now farm-junkies. MLIA

Today, I realized that most people my age on Friday nights are at clubs or bar hopping. I spent the last 4 hours playing hide and seek in a three story building. It was all totally worth it. MLIA

Today my mom attempted to make Sushi. She burnt it. MLIA

Today I asked my Mom, "What is the point of the penny?" She replied, "Well, it's a circle, so I don't think it has a point." MLIA

Today I learned that it is against the law in Kansas to pass the state line with a duck upon your head. I've never been so tempted to cross the state line with a duck on my head before. MLIA
***Okay. At some point, I need people to come with me on a road trip for this specific purpose.

Today, I was texting and suddenly I couldn't remember what I did with my phone. When my friend texted me "What's up?" I replied with, "I'll text you later, I can't find my phone." After I hit send, I realized what I'd done... MLIA
***Don't laugh. Don't laugh.***

Today I came home after school and took a nap. When I woke up my dog was biting my hand and my mom was laughing hysterically. When she finally stopped I asked her why she was laughing. She told me that while I was asleep I was twitching....... a lot, and was accidentally hitting my dog in the face for the last 20 minutes. MLIA

Customers are Fun

In Search Of Common Law And Common Sense
Law Firm | Phoenix, AZ, USA

Me: “This is [law firm], how can I help you?”
Customer: “Are you located on the fifth floor?”
Me: “Yes.”
Customer: “Well, I am on the fifth floor and there are no offices here.”
Me: “There are three law firms on the fifth floor, ma’am. We are the one all the way to the right of the elevator.”
Customer: “No, there are no offices on this floor. It’s totally open. And, its hot.”
Me: “Hot?”
Customer: “Yeah, it's hot. I think you gave me the wrong address.”
(Verifies address, customer has the correct address.)
Customer: “Well, it's just an open floor. I got out of my car up here and there’s no office.”
Me: “Are you… are you on the fifth floor of the parking garage?”
(My office window looks out at the roof (fifth) level of the parking garage. Sure enough there is a women on her cell phone pacing around the roof level of the parking garage.
Customer: “You told me to go to the fifth floor.”
Me: “Of the office building, ma’am, not of the parking garage.”

Chuck Norris Factoid of the Day

"There are no weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq. Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma. "

Funny Pics
from the collection

from the life & times of jessi bean

I still need tape. You know. So I can decorate my desk??
:: sigh ::
Completely invalid attemp at hilarities. Actually, nothing fascinating or humorous happened to me today. At all. Period. Nope.

Someone needs to come liven up my day.

People of Chase
from the life & times of … you!

Never complain about MY AHT again…LOL

And I quote - "It's got coffee & cheez wiz in it! Disgusting!"

Live…From California!!
from the adventures of SPA (my nephew & his friends)

Xzavier read my dOrk fOrces (Wednesday) about how I love the fact that Metallica and the Misfits are still being listened to the newer generations, or maybe they just thought they were cool t-shirts.

Nope. They are being listened to. My nephew proceeded to post a Metallica song quote as his status on MySpace every few hours until I got home, logged in, and saw them.

Top Ten List

The Top 10 Signs You're Flying On A Bad Airline

The engine's being held on by duct tape.

You see the Gorilla from those old Samsonite commercials running loose up and down the aisles.

In-flight movie has "Ernest" in its title.

Pilot informs you that you're at cruising altitude and he's gonna put the top down.

Instead of Peanuts, you get a healthy helping of SPAM.

As you're taking off, the stewardess mentions the phrase "Guest Pilot Program"

The seats are wet due to flotation device moisture.

The stewardess asks you to join the Mile High Club..."she" has a beard and bigger arms than you!

Pilot asks if there is anyone else who wants a shot of Beam before he finishes the bottle.

You look down and see a copy of "Fixing a Plane for Dummies" by the mechanic's feet!!!

Learn from My Fail

Never ever try to shave over a sunburn, especially if it is peeling. There is only one outcome, and it is not smooth legs. It is pain. #LFMF

When attempting to light a gas fire pit, do NOT lean over it to listen for gas. Yes, it is on. Yes, that "Burnt Hair" smell stays for about a week. #LFMF

Chocolate Milk does NOT make Chocolate Cottage Cheese. #LFMF

It’s really not a good idea to put on fresh Chapstick just before grooming your horse. Especially during shedding season. #LFMF

Saline nose spray is not a substitute for saline contact solution. #LFMF

Have a fantastic Friday, yall.